Regarding the likely strong influence the WT's negative messaging has had on me emotionally since my very early childhood notice the following mentioned at https://www.jwfacts.com/watchtower/wrong-with-being-jehovahs-witness.php .
'The 1958 From Paradise Lost to Paradise Regained book was used as the Bible stories book for children until the 1978 release of My Book of Bible Stories.
As a child I had recurrent nightmares of falling off a cliff and I have
little doubt that the following pictures and text from page 209 had
damaging affects on myself and other impressionable children.
... To be a Witness requires a special thinking process, one that motivates a
person to urgency in these unprecedented wicked 'last days'. Negative
imagery is constantly presented to keep members in a constant downcast
state about the people around and the times we live in. Global
catastrophies are welcomed as 'proof' that few years are left before
Armageddon.
... The reality of the times we live in is quite different. A study of
history shows that now is a time of comparable peace. Human rights,
particularly for women and children are far greater than ever. Medical
advances mean that the life expectancy in many countries has doubled in
the last 100 years and can be enjoyed with far less pain. The average
person living in developed countries enjoy luxuries few Kings had access
to in centuries gone by. It was stated in the March 24-28th 2005 Australian Financial Review that we are living in the healthiest, most peaceful, best period of time in all history.
The Watchtower needs to prove conditions are far worse than they
really are to prove it to be the Last Days and create urgency in
followers to devote themselves to growing the organisation. Healthy
religions do not need to create negative urgency as they are based
around serving God rather than serving for salvation. Positive religions
focus on improvement in life by establishment of schools, hospitals and
charities, whilst a Witness waits and waits for a future time when
things will get better.
... As standard with high control groups, members are discouraged from
associating with people not part of the group; to be "no part of the
world". The Watchtower view of "worldly people" is insidiously
pervasive. In Watchtower publications and at meetings the evilness of
all aspects of the world and its people is presented so consistently
that it becomes mentally invasive to the point that in my opinion it
damages a followers grip on reality.
...
... "While some contact with worldly people is unavoidable - at work, at
school, and otherwise - we must be vigilant so as to keep from being
sucked back into the death-dealing atmosphere of this world. ... Let the
world go along in its way, reaping its bad fruitage in the form of
broken homes, illegitimate births, sexually transmitted diseases, such
as AIDS, and countless other emotional and physical woes." Watchtower 1987 Sep 15 p.12 Breathing This World's "Air" Is Death-Dealing!
... The Watchtower is particularly harsh in its descriptions of members of
other religions, including Christians. So strong were Rutherfords
denunciations on other religions that one newspaper described the early
Bible Students as a religion of hate. The venomous terminology used has
continued down to this day.
... (3) WE ABHOR anti-God philosophies and practices, so common in
Christendom, such as evolution, blood transfusions, abortions, lying,
greed, and dishonesty. In our worship and way of life, WE WILL HONOR our
Creator, Jehovah God, the Almighty, whose ways are described at
Revelation 15:3 as "righteous and true."
... As previously discussed in detail, the Watchtower teaches that shortly
the "billions of people who do not know Jehovah [will] perish during
the great tribulation." (w93 10/1 p.19) The billions of rotting cadavers
will be left as "Birds and beasts
gorge themselves on the unburied bodies of Gog's crowd." (w88 9/15
p.26) This inhumane picture invalidates the existence of virtually every
one of a Witnesses neighbors, school friends and workmates.
In the following picture Jehovah's Witnesses are shown smiling as
the world and its billions of inhabitants are destroyed at Armageddon.
Does God Really Care About Us? (1992) p.22
... By describing worldly people in the vilest of terms forms a negative and
unrealistic opinion of anyone that is not a Jehovah's Witnesses.
Those
raised as Jehovah's Witnesses do not know any better and often believe
that all worldly people are bad and not be trusted, holding deep seated
fear of leaving the Watchtower Society. Even when I no longer believed
Watchtower doctrine I held tremendous fear of leaving, believing I would
never find true friends or happiness and quite probably become
suicidal. The opposite has occurred.
... No one comes in for more degrading references than "apostates",
those that stop believing Watchtower represents the only true religion.
"Persons who deliberately spread (stubbornly hold to and speak
about) teachings contrary to Bible truth as taught by Jehovah's
Witnesses are apostates." Pay Attention to Yourself and to All the Flock p.94
Apostates are considered and treated worse than adulterers,
paedophiles and murderers. Apostates must not be spoken to and their
books must not be read. They must be "loathed" and "hated", are said to
eat from the "table of demons", and are "reserved for destruction";
strong words indeed. So dominant is this fear that the Watchtower labels
all apostates as part of the antichrist, which is unfair as many
apostates remain as Christians. Consider the following statements.
"Apostasy is, in reality, a rebellion against Jehovah." Watchtower 1993 Oct 1 p.19
"How can we safeguard ourselves from following the course of
ridiculers? One way is to avoid associating with those who show a
critical attitude. (Read Psalm 1:1.) This means that we do not listen to
or read anything from apostates." Watchtower Study Edition October 2022 p.20
"Satan was the first creature to turn apostate. Modern-day
apostates display characteristics similar to those of the Devil. Their
mind may be poisoned by a critical attitude toward individuals in the
congregations, Christian elders, or the Governing Body. Some apostates
oppose the use of the divine name, Jehovah. They are not interested in
learning about Jehovah or in serving him. Like their father, Satan,
apostates target people of integrity. (John 8:44) No wonder servants of
Jehovah avoid all contact with them!" Examining the Scriptures Daily 2011 Aug 18 p.83
"Some apostates are increasingly using various forms of mass
communication, including the Internet, to spread false information about
Jehovah's Witnesses." Watchtower 2000 May 1 p.10
"For one thing, some of the apostate literature presents falsehoods
by means of "smooth talk" and "counterfeit words." (Romans 16:17, 18; 2
Peter 2:3) What would you expect from the table of demons? ... Those
who have continued to feed at Satan's spiritual table, the table of
demons, will be forced to attend a literal meal, no, not as partakers,
but as the main course-to their destruction!" Watchtower 1994 Jul 1 p.12
"True Christians share Jehovah's feelings toward such apostates;
they are not curious about apostate ideas. On the contrary, they "feel a
loathing" toward those who have made themselves God's enemies, but they
leave it to Jehovah to execute vengeance." Watchtower 1993 Nov 1 p.19
"The obligation to hate lawlessness also applies to all activity by
apostates. Our attitude toward apostates should be that of David, who
declared: "Do I not hate those who are intensely hating you" Watchtower 1992 Jul 15 pp.12-13 Christ Hated Lawlessness-Do You?
"But remember, in this case Jehovah is the One who tells us in his
Word what to do. And what does he say about apostates? "Avoid them"
(Romans 16:17, 18); "quit mixing in company with" them (1 Corinthians
5:11); and "never receive [them] into your homes or say a greeting to
[them]" (2 John 9, 10)." Watchtower 1986 Mar 15 p.13
"Such ones [apostates] willfully abandoning the Christian
congregation thereby become part of the 'antichrist.' (1 John 2:18, 19)"
Watchtower 1985 Jul 15 p.31
"With apostates earth wide being destroyed, what reason can one have for confidence of life in paradise to follow?" Kingdom Ministry Sep 1973 p.6
... When a person is first introduced to Watchtower doctrine, the appearance
is of a loving, peaceful organisation with a wonderful hope for the
future.
Peel back the layers and what lies underneath is the antithesis.
Whilst presented as a religion of love, a fundamental component of
the
message is the destruction of billions of non-believing "worldly"
people. Members are constantly reminded of their sinfulness, and
requirement to work harder at what are thinly veiled demands to provide
labour and resources to grow the organisation. It is a religion of
extreme control, dictated by a Governing Body that must not be
questioned, without dire consequences. This side is rarely fully
appreciated prior to baptism.'
When I was a very young child (and to a lessor extent even as an older child) I often had very terrifying nightmares. Maybe those nightmares were the result of me studying (why I was a very young child) the WT's book from 1958 called From Paradise Lost to Paradise Regained and seeing its extremely horrid pictures, as well as studying other literature of the WT.
I need to purge my subconscious mind of the very harmful programming which was done to me by studying WT literature as a child, in order to become happy.
